04/30/2013

The Daily Chatter*

04/30/2013

I was finally able to post the installer pictures today.

https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.447940991958092.1073741828.268554383230088&type=1&l=e4a55dd256

Roger said he hugged a black homeless woman this morning but that’s all he could say. Is he starting something new or is the state making him do this?

Mary called today to see how Riley was doing and she’s returning home today. She said she couldn’t call earlier just in case Riley was being a pest.

Rick is the man today.

Bill really wants to open Mary’s package sitting on her desk. Never mind he found out what it was, he texted her.

Roger is now basing things on his opinion.

I needed something on the top shelf today so I asked Bill where Roxanne was at.

The new season of “Arrested Development” comes to Netflix on May 26^th so now I’m going to busy on Memorial Day.

Tim’s pallet business idea fell completely to sh*t today. Yet the Asians next door are loving our pallets, I bet they know something that Tim doesn’t know or they're pulling a “Sell This House Extreme” and decorating with them.

It’s great blaming everything on Mary since she’s not here.

Steve and Cher have now hyphenated both of their names together. I hope this was only for their time cards.

Rick’s two steps beyond Roger as Roger said it himself.

“That’s not all I’m doing on the floor.” Bill    I’m just not sure what he was doing on the floor to begin with but you can ask Roger.

Everyone thinks Riley is our mascot and it was sad seeing her go home today.

Bill figured out today that Target sends someone over to his building complex to collect the carts in the morning. I told him if he pushes one of those around everywhere someone’s going to think he’s homeless, unless of course Roxanne is riding inside. 

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/29/2013

The Daily Chatter*

04/29/2013

Bill now can get Jimmy John’s delivered to his door as he found out over the weekend and he was also bragging that it only takes him 12 minutes to get here from his new place. 

Toni thinks his coffee was spiked this morning. I told him I wanted some but amazingly there wasn't any left.

I was so mad at Mary in my dream last night. She informed me that she had separated from Randy and that she was engaged to a douche bag guy that came into the office. I then started crying in my dream and getting upset as to how to tell her that I thought she made a horrible decision.

“I can do a lot three times in two minutes.” Toni

Ferguson said we have wild dogs running around here today. 

If anyone wants to donate to Jason's cause he wants money to buy a carton of cigarettes while he's in Portland. 

Toni has turned into a trucker, he has the plaid shirt and the hat on today.  

Tim owes me big time, that's all I can say.

Cher and Matt had the largest parts in “Sell This House Extreme” on Saturday. I would post pictures but Facebook is giving me too much attitude. So here are a few. 

Mary your little baby is doing fine, she needs to learn some manners though. She got mad at me when she couldn't reach her new toy. 

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/26/2013

The Daily Chatter*

4/26/2013

Steve feels like he’s been ignored from Bill ever since he started dating. He mentioned that Bill hasn’t told him to shave lately.

Matt wants to know why the installers aren’t staying at the nice Marriott’s when they go out of town, he feels jipped and wants to date Roxanne for awhile. 

This is the weekend that all of our guys are on “Sell This House Extreme”. That maybe too scary to watch.

Roger wanted me to start putting happy thoughts and quotes in the Chatter because he saw some quotes on a certain somebody’s FB page. I'm pretty sure he'll tell me to stop after seeing these.

Bill came up with Confucius say "Man who have five dicks, has pant that fit like glove."

I found “Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.”

Toni got a superhero haircut last night. 

Tim was sure quick to pull out his wife’s wallet yesterday to pay for his lunch.

Bill bought a book accidentally on Amazon last night all because of Roger.

Roger thinks Riley is a lazy dog.

“Do you want to touch it?” Toni to Bill

Rick now apparently thinks my name is Rachael. You would be surprised how many people have called me that.

Mary has apparently taught her dog not to like Crystal, Riley didn’t want to go near her today.

“I screwed you though.” Roger to Bill

Roger now considers the front part of our office The West Wing. Bill wants to have a dodge ball fight East Wing vs. West Wing.

Roger thinks it’s inhumane of Mary to send her dog to the office without any toys so I had to give her my bra since I’ve heard that’s what she likes to play with. 

Roger better sanitize his desk Monday morning if he knows whats good for him. 

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/25/2013

The Daily Chatter*

04/25/2013

This is going to blow your mind; Bill came back from his vacation with Rocks!

Tim wanted to stick a pole up Riley’s butt and use her as a mop. Don't worry Mary I didn't let him near the dog after that comment.

I’m starting to think that maybe we need to get Joe and Garret a desk because they’ve been hanging out allot around here.

Toni was quite the man last night even though he didn’t want me to mention it in the chatter. He caught a car burglar last night, ran him into an alley made the guy drop the purses and then got the guy arrested. All of this while he was out for his evening jog.

Riley barked at Roger and she growled at the mail woman, what does she know?

“I’ll think of a way to screw it up.” Roger

Roger wants to take Riley home as a present for his wife.

Bill wants to find somebody else to do the Chatter. He thinks I’m irresponsible for not getting it out on Friday the day of the BBQ and for last nights being tremendously late.

We heard a pretty funny story at lunch about Tim in his younger days. He got a job at Royal Fork Buffet and had been working there a month and was then offered a higher paying position by the Union to picket the restaurant and he did that for over a year. So that is where his picketing career started. 

"Do you think you're having a stroke from your tumor?" Bill to Toni 

Bill showed me his pictures from his vacation today and I'm a little concerned at what I saw. 

This first picture I'm assuming that Bill was trying to get on top of Roxanne in some meadow while trying to bend her like a barbie doll and her dad decided to take a picture, that's really kind of kinky. Then the next picture I'm pretty sure Roxanne's carrying a hammer to beat the crap out of Bill for laughing at her with her one wet shoe after the creek incident.Then in the third Roxanne picked up a frog without gloves. Bill just got through telling Toni not to pick up frogs without gloves because  you can get warts. 

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/24/2013

The Daily Chatter*

4/24/2013

Apparently Bill thinks he only has two personalities or at least that’s what he told Roxanne, “Nice Guy and Mr. Awesome.” I told Roxanne that he was holding out on her.

Mary wants another kid so that she can have slave labor again.

Rick claims that money is a great motivator and that’s why he installs despite the crippling pain.

Now everything in Toni’s mind is from Tennessee, he’s been listening to that song way too much this week.

Matt had a good day out on the golf course but of course any day that Matt gets to drink beer is a great day for him.

Toni’s going to be so excited to hear that Steve hired a young installer but Toni he’s not for you and Mary you can’t just “accidentally” walk in on him and check him out while he’s in the bathroom. The last employee she did that to had to move to another state.

It’s a good thing that Dot comes home tomorrow so that she can keep Roger in line. He’s quite a handful when he’s left to make his own decisions.

Toni’s already trying to take my Riley dog sitting privileges away from me.  

“You have that Aids again?” Roger to Rick

Bill better be ready to answer questions tomorrow because we have a lot of them….

*not to be construed as Gossip