09/24/2014

The Daily Chatter*

09/24/2014

That Roger, Marty tattled on him today and said he was making us women  in the office sound like bimbos. I'm going to need a formal apology from Roger on this and the other 259 things he's said about me just this week, here's just a few of his insults. 
#1. "Any similarity between you and a human is purely coincidental."
#2. "Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you worse advice."
#3. "Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?"
#4. "I'd like to leave you with one thought....but I'm not sure you have anywhere to put it."
#5. "I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?"

Tim hates ceramic tile today but he doesn't hate the money.

"You can't call a guy a bird." Mary to Tim as she was singing The Beatles Blackbird song.

Bill's concerned that he might accidentally slice his neck while trying to answer his razor thin phone.

Typhinee called me a Mother F*cker for no good apparent reason.  She now owes me an apology too.

I think I bribed Tim to come to work tomorrow with cake. I'm not sure how all of you are going to get him to come to work next week....

"I think I'm funny." Bill to someone on the phone

"You should F***ing leave me alone." Mary

*not to be construed as Gossip