08/09/2013

The Daily Chatter*

08/09/2013

Roger wants to tell his customer that she's on crack.

Rick thinks he got food poisoning at the Italian restaurant with Roger. Maybe Toni was onto something yesterday when he mentioned that Roger was poisoning people.

"I'm not kidding #$##, you take me seriously when I'm taking to you."  Roger to Mary

"I'll be working for your stupid son in law."  Roger to Mary

I'm afraid that if Toni had a yacht this is what it would look like.

Bill has crabs! Roxanne also claims that was a boat he made but it sure looks like something else to me...

Roger told me that I could visit the man cave any time now. He says the no girl rule has changed. I think he was just in a good mood this afternoon.

*not to be construed as Gossip

08/08/2013

The Daily Chatter*

08/08/2013

I mentioned this morning that Roger was killing me and Toni asked if Roger had poisoned me. I have to apologize to Roger, I had a GB moment and blew up before having all the answers,  I found the PO so I guess he wasn't trying to kill me after all.

Mary and Tim, thanks to the both of you I had a parenting envelope filled with coupons in my mailbox last night. Who the heck have you been talking to and what have I been buying that everyone thinks that I'm pregnant.

"That's what you get for being dumb." Toni

Tim thought he was being sneaky, he forwarded Jessica The Chatter link so then I had to forward her the other link for the blog that I have all about Tim.

Toni wants to know why we don't do cocaine here on a regular basis.

FYI, Toni and I will not be in tomorrow because it already feels like Friday to us.

Mary's been obnoxiously happy today, she and Randy get to go on an almost all expenses paid Alaska cruise at the end of the month and her son Ryan comes home to visit tonight.

Vance thinks that Mary was giving out back handed compliments today.

Toni was going to quit his job today to go and work for one of Jessica's old employers (who is apparently way cooler than we are) until he found out the guy doesn't work there anymore.

 *not to be construed as Gossip

 

08/07/2013

The Daily Chatter*

08/07/2013

Roger was sure thankful that we dumped the temp. He said he sneezed once in front of her and instead of saying Bless You she asked if it was a cold or allergies. He thought he was allowed to sneeze once without it being anything.

Toni informed us today that Tim can't change anymore in the back because Jessica's here.

Tim and Mary think I'm pregnant because they claim that I have a certain glow about me. Wait till after this weekend when I get to go to the zoo and then Mexican food afterwards, they'll think I'm pregnant with triplets.

According to The Onion, the headline for this story was "Obama not sure how to tell Nation this, but he ran over Jimmy Carter with car last night." 

Toni said today would be a good day to start crack.

Roger and Rick left together today in the Shagtastic mobile and the strange thing is that Rick even left his dog here. What were they doing that the dog couldn't watch?

"I'm not going to make you sleep with my mom." Mary to Randy

How many times can somebody named Garret change their phone number in one year?

I think Toni knocked off somebody, he won't tell me who though. It's probably the job that Roger asked him to do.

*not to be construed as Gossip

08/06/2013

The Daily Chatter*

08/06/2013

At least Roger didn't disappoint me today and on top of it he told me that he took a shower, double score.

I was laughing last night telling Ryan about Toni's facial expressions when the temp broke the copier yesterday.

Steve told us that Jenny could sub for us but that she would have to get rid of the baby. I suggested giving Maci to Mary and he agreed.

"You can go laugh at me now." Mary to Tim

Watch out Jenny, Steve wants some dreadlock looking carpet now after our wool Product Knowledge meeting this morning.

The Marriott Airport Shuttle pulled up to our front door today so Toni and I did what anyone would do, we ran to the shuttle, picked our seats and decided we were ready to start our vacation to anywhere. Toni figured that his new BFF Roxanne must have arranged for this (he thinks they're BFF's because she texted him once). We changed the radio station while the driver was next door and Toni did some singing and choreography for me and then the dang shuttle driver came back only to tell us to get the F*** off. We didn't go easy though, it wasn't until the four policeman came and lifted us off the shuttle while we were kicking and screaming that we decided to go back to our desks and work only because they duct taped us to our chairs. 

Mary doesn't want anything from Starbucks today she just wants a baby. Nobody freaking asked me because I want Starbucks:)

You're welcome Toni! I told the temp we didn't need her anymore this week.

How can Steve's truck be broken? All of his tires are still attached. 

*not to be construed as Gossip

08/05/2013

The Daily Chatter*

08/05/2013

The temp service sent us different lady than they originally promised so we were actually able to  pronounce this one's name. I will have to say she reminds me quite a bit of Chandler's girlfriend Janice.

Steve and Toni were getting awfully cozy with each other today at Bill's desk.

Speaking of Bill, isn't it odd that he goes out of town and somebody in Grayland (which is where he is) dies over the weekend at the ocean.

Tim informed Joe that he can't quit. I second that petition and I'm pretty sure that Mary and Roger will sign it too.

Steve and Toni got into a huge fight after Steve informed Toni that his phone was a little outdated.  I think that's when they stopped sitting on each others laps.

Roger thinks that Toni sitting at Bill's desk is just a preview of the coming attractions.

My ex-boyfriend John Cusack is going to be playing a serial killer in an upcoming movie. It's no wonder why I fell out of love with him.

"Bill's so full of bull..." Mary

I'm am so the man today, I fixed the copier that the temp broke before Toni could make it back from the warehouse with his tools and pink hardhat.

*not to be construed as Gossip

08/02/2013

The Daily Chatter*

08/02/2013

Roger's advice for some customers is to first hire a good arsonist.

I just heard that Dot's going to be out of town so that of course means that Roger will be having another wild party.

Steve and Jenny had some of the most adorable baby pictures taken. After seeing these Roger had to turn the conversation into all about himself. He decided that once he and Dot start having grand kids that they aren't going to have any money and he may end up homeless.

Roger finally admitted to us that Ray Charles was his heroine dealer back in the day. 

Bill left early today so we are already blaming him for everything.

Roger might have rug burns, it sounds like one of his customers got on the floor for him (or with him, I'm not sure) or was she trying to keep him out of her house by laying in front of the door, I'm all confused.

It's raining and icky outside, it's totally Bill's fault.

"I'm going to watch it... but I'm going to hate it." Roger to Toni about "Inception"

"I lie..I don't tell the truth." Mary 

*not to be construed as Gossip

08/01/2013

The Daily Chatter*

08/01/2013

Tim is such a b*st*rd, he leaves work for the rest of the week and left me with his leaky garbage bag that was spewing out slurpee and chew all over me this morning. I know he sabotaged me on purpose:)

We need to keep giving Serge jobs because he brought us in some pretty dang good doughnuts today.

Toni mentioned that Nikki's picking up some girls tonight and that's why she drove herself to work. Roger started telling Toni how this could be a good thing for him, perve.

Roger sure seems to know how to step in crap and smear it all over the place.

Toni did a performance of NKOTB for us today with a little singing of Step by Step. 

Hmm, I heard that Mary and some Beaulieu rep hooked up in Vegas.....Wasn't Bill supposed to be watching her?

"I think I'm so funny." Toni

Toni's going to go home and celebrate Harry Potter's birthday. He told us that he's going to go home dress up in his robes and play with his wand....

*not to be construed as Gossip