12/31/2018

The Daily Chatter*

12/31/2018

I'm starting to think that Michael holds onto grudges longer than Roger.

Do people think that I'm an alcoholic and that's why nobody has given me booze this year? Ashley got a keg of fireball from Michael today.

I know most of you probably got an extra friend request from (the imposter) me yesterday on FB and if I asked you for money and told you the sob story that I'm an alcoholic and that my husband beats me, it's all true and I'll take whatever money you want to throw at me.

Everyone have a safe and wonderful New Years.

*not to be construed as Gossip

12/28/2018

The Daily Chatter*

12/28/2018

Stephanie is in labor today, very exciting but we will never see Mary again after this baby is born. 

Typhinee insulted me and called me out as to why I don't have any exciting stories.

We're not going to know how to act next week when we get Faith and Roger back from vacation.

Don't ask Toni what a pimiento is because he thinks it has something to do with the birthing process when in actuality it is a pepper.

*not to be construed as Gossip

12/27/2018

The Daily Chatter*

12/27/2018

Yoda definitely is a mysterious being, I was taking down Bill's Yoda lights and they started working again. The Yoda made Bill's printer print some weird hieroglyphics also.

Toni is responsible for getting everyone in the office high today.

Facebook is very intrusive, it emailed me this morning and pretty much called me an idiot and said that I had to add Sarah as a FB friend or is was going to post all of our private conversations about our boring lives.

Sarah thinks that Roger's in Egypt and not in Australia because of what her phone told her. I think maybe I have to be nice to him,what if he's some sort of Egyptian prince and he's too embarrassed to tell us or flash his money in front of us.

*not to be construed as Gossip

12/26/2018

The Daily Chatter*

12/26/2018

I couldn't believe that Mary came in today, I figured that she would be over at Stephanie's trying to push that baby out of her. It's possible that Stephanie already has a restraining order against her mother.

Typhinee wasn't very impressed with her Christmas gift, she got a pink purse which isn't her favorite color but it is Kellen's so maybe she can trade him for something.

Monday at the office was very quiet, turned out to be just Kellen and me so I raided everyone's desks and Sarah won for the best candy, Toni won for the most dick drawings and Michael won for the most blackmail pictures, sheesh (I have a feeling that he's going to extort some money or maybe somebody's new office pretty soon).

Man I feel old, a headline just said that Mariah Carey's All I Want for Christmas Is You was released 24 years ago, that's almost a Toni or an Ashley lifetime ago.

*not to be construed as Gossip

12/21/2018

The Daily Chatter*

12/21/2018

I guess things went well on Michael and Ashley's date last night. Michael asked Ashley this morning if she returned her room key.

Today's going to be a good day, I've been upgraded from grim reaper to witch by Michael.

"The only thing worse than Tim shenanigan's are when he and I do them together." Bill

Seriously, Bud and Steve get Tequila as a gift from an installer and that same installer gives the office people a mug, what gives. The rest of us need booze too especially since we have to put up with Steve.

I think my co-workers are about to send me to counseling for my Kellen obsession.

I think Mary heard about Michael and Ashley because she said she was sick to her stomach.

Michael said that we need Kellen back.

I think all of the women in the office left Matt scratching his head about Steve today.

*not to be construed as Gossip

12/20/2018

The Daily Chatter*

12/20/2018

Michael and Ashley have their date in Bellevue tonight. Tim and Toni were telling Ashley this morning that if she really wants to be wowed Michael should take her to the gym....Does Michael have a six pack or something? What exactly am I missing out on?

Tim is out until the beginning of the year unless someone has cash for him then I'm pretty sure he would show up.

Roger's going to be in trouble if he doesn't bring Sarah back a kangaroo.

Kellen called Steve today and Toni claims that he didn't call him an a$$hole but wished him a Merry Christmas.

I think all of the men around here think that I'm a prima donna. Marty was trying to be nice and called me the queen (instead of biatch) last week and now Michael thinks that I only ride expensive brooms.

*not to be construed as Gossip 

12/19/2018

The Daily Chatter*

12/19/2018

I thought my husband screwed up and ordered two Instapots, the boxes were identical,  luckily one of them was Mary's.

Typhinee yelled at me for not telling her that our waitress yelled at Ryan at the Christmas party all because of Heather.

Tim is pretty much taking all next year off, he sent me his list of dates and he's going to miss my birthday and his own birthday and pretty much everyone else's birthday.

*not to be construed as Gossip