07/29/2016

The Daily Chatter*

07/29/2016

Roger's explanation of why he prefers cinnamon buns to virgins. "You don't have to train a cinnamon roll. You don't have to call a cinnamon roll the next day. You never have to buy flowers for a cinnamon roll. Need I go on???"

"You know you're a pushy little sh*t." Bill to Steve

Toni's sister texted him and asked him if he wanted to go camping next weekend with her husband and their parents. Toni naturally said yes so I guess the wedding will have to be postponed another year.

Matt's going to be in Portland so he won't be able to wedding crash.

Apparently Tim would like to spend two days with Matt and be completely irresponsible.

Toni's getting his marriage license tonight. I wonder who it will name as his to be spouse? I'm pretty sure Matt and Steve both put the moves on him today.

Mary's taking all of next week off and she won't say why. I'm pretty sure she's either going to get an overly exuberant boob job or she's going to have a face implant to look like Kenny Rogers. Just so that she'll be the talk of the town at Nikki and Toni's wedding.

*not to be construed as Gossip

07/28/2016

The Daily Chatter*

07/28/2016

Roger would rather have cinnamon buns than virgins. I knew that man was weird.

Toni almost didn't make it back across the street last night after going to the barber.

Toni mentioned that he had to visit his photographer tonight. I think that was his fancy word for therapist trying to turn him straight before the wedding in almost a week.

Tim is off frolicking in Oregon today with some bs excuse and it's not even August yet. 

*not to be construed as Gossip

07/27/2016

The Daily Chatter*

07/27/2016

Tim is basically going to take the month of August off.

"You wish you were me, even I wish I was me." Tim to Bill

Baby G. laughed for the first time last night for Bill. Now Bill's feeling pretty darn special.

Thank-you to Andrew for the birthday and the cake even though he decided not to come into the office today.

Tim realized recently that he can't retire because he always needs more toys.

Mary found a dress for herself that she thinks will outdo her daughter on her wedding day.

*not to be construed as Gossip

07/26/2016

The Daily Chatter*

07/26/2016

Toni got sh*tted on this morning (hopefully by a bird and not what Steve's neighbors throw).

Bill didn't believe Toni this morning all because I drank a little too much today and I was the only witness.

Michael was a real bum sore today about my Alaska cruise at the end of August.

Tim paid Michael a compliment today even though he really shouldn't have.

Everyone wants to know what the image is on my email for the Daily Chatter. The answer is I don't know but it adds itself whenever I don't have pictures in the Chatter.

Roger found out today how much Typhinee defends him every single day.

Typhinee's daughter got a job today so we will be throwing Typhinee a retirement party next week.

Mary's cooking for all of us tonight so make sure to drop by.  She doesn't want anybody to bring a thing since she threw this surprise on all of us at the last minute.

*not to be construed as Gossip

07/25/2016

The Daily Chatter*

07/25/2016

Mary was the culprit who found Typhinee's birthday card on her desk on Friday. 

Toni claims he saw a goat at the bar this weekend. It was Nikki's bachelorette weekend so he was probably wasted.

"I don't have nice things to say about anyone to be perfectly honest." Toni

Tim forgot his wallet at home today and he made Bill take him to lunch and pay for him.  I'm going to start doing that.

Tim wants a new iphone but he doesn't want to pay for one, all he really wants to do is argue with the sales person.

Leave it to Tim to tell horrible depressing stories. That's usually Roger's job.

"Now I'm going to shoot myself." Toni

 I saw some of Roger's relatives on Saturday at the Woodland Park Zoo. They were stumped as to why Roger hasn't visited them lately.

*not to be construed as Gossip

07/22/2016

The Daily Chatter*

07/22/2016

According to Tim "creeping the internet" is any research that you do online.

Tim learned all about Google Maps today and the pictures of places that you can see. He couldn't figure out what the arrow was for on the road so I had to make fun of him and show him that he can virtually drive just about anywhere.

Tim almost blew his cover today, he mentioned that he only goes to the Yellowbeak Tavern to pick up (long pause)... takeout dinner.

Toni tried to tell me that it's not always about size but I disagreed with him. 

Toni's laser measure was going crazy next to him today, I asked him if it also had Gaydar. 

Tim bailed on our happy hour celebration tonight "because of traffic". 

*not to be construed as Gossip

07/21/2016

The Daily Chatter*

07/21/2016

"What's this bullsh*t that you were spreading about me yesterday?" Roger to me  The funny thing is Roger thinks it's very possible that Garry Marshall was making a movie about him though.

 To whomever dropped the ball on forgetting about Typhinee's birthday card on their desk, she still wants it.

I invited Roger to the winery tomorrow night but I was only hoping that Dot would be able to make it. 

Marty called to tell Toni that his days are numbered, he has 15 days left. I asked Toni if Marty recommended a young girl to sleep with before he marries.

Mary obviously thinks she's working an evening shift tonight, she came in at 4pm today. I'm beginning to think prostitution pays better than flooring.

The world's first ridable luggage, Modobag. I'm kind of scared, it's just one more thing to run me over at the airport.

*not to be construed as Gossip