04/29/2016

The Daily Chatter*

04/29/2016

Toni is down to less than 100 days before he gets married. I hope Nikki knows what she's getting.

Good news, Donna's going to be able to make Roxanne's baby shower tomorrow. Great I need to remember to bring my Tim Diaries too. Tim doesn't get into as much trouble as Roger so there's not as many chapters to go through but she'll still want to see it.

As far as Tim goes this is pretty much his daily schedule unless it's Disc Golf Wednesday.

Toni is taking Nikki to a charity event tonight and it's being held at one of her competitors stores. I told Toni to hide all of her spray paint and matches.

Matt graced the office with his presence today. He's been avoiding us for some reason.

I really don't think these examples helped Bill because honestly if your baby can lift weights and pour and drink booze from a glass you let them because you obviously have an amazing kid. Bill still hasn't received the memo that you can't clean your kid in the dishwasher though, Roxanne is still working on that one with him.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/28/2016

The Daily Chatter*

04/28/2016

Toni is now freaked out about rabies thanks to Bill. Apparently we need to have a 5,000 mile race for the cure just like Dunder Mifflin.

Roger seems to cower at just the sight of me.

Roger, it's possible that Dot will read the headline on MSN titled "A new study says cheating may be good for you" before Saturday and have a better understanding of how you think and why you do the things that you do.

Bill's desk is apparently a knife shop. Everyone heard that he got a knife sharpener and he is one popular guy now.

Typhinee was a super star today. She couldn't go pee because she was too busy with clients.

I think we're safe, I don't think Tim saw "The Middle" last night with the million dollar idea. The boys were selling grilled cheese sandwiches from their motor home on a college campus.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/27/2016

The Daily Chatter*

04/27/2016

Tim's thankful that his wife comes back today from New York because he's out of frozen pizzas. Isn't he a sweetheart.

Roger informed me that I didn't help his sales by sleeping with his customers. I'm completely insulted. 

It sounds like everyone was entertained by Tim loading guys out the door this morning.

"You say fraud, I say free car." Steve explaining how he's an ideal citizen

I thought it was strange, Calvin Klein came in today and he was wearing a Sean John shirt. The dude needs to learn how to promote himself.

*not to be construed as Gossip

 

04/26/2016

The Daily Chatter*

04/26/2016

I just found out the other night that killer whales belong to the dolphin family. I bet Toni has something against dolphins too.

Ryan, if you happen to hear something about me and some really old Asian man from Roger it's all true. Roger said that he wouldn't tell but I know he's full of crap. Especially since I have a book and a half to share with Dot on Saturday.

I'm a little scared, Big Ben in London is supposed to undergo a bunch of renovations. What's going to happen to the internet. It normally sits in a metal box at the top of Big Ben according to the "I.T. Crowd."

Drew Barrymore is apparently happy now after divorcing husband #3. She only has one more divorce to go and she'll be caught up to her fathers record.

Roger met a guy who looked and laughed like Buster from "Arrested Development". He told me that I should sleep with this guy too but I said he sounded like an a$$hole on the phone.

Toni mentioned that he's the slut of the flooring industry. I think it's his turn to take some of this action off of my hands. Normally that's Mary's job but she's been too busy with real business.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/25/2016

The Daily Chatter*

04/25/2016

Tim just now noticed the doorbell chime at the front door. Needless to say he had to play with it like a two year old would.

Toni now wants a dudeoir photo shoot, before he gets married, after seeing this guy and his awesome photos.
http://www.sheknows.com/living/slideshow/list/5905/dudeoir-photos/trying-to-keep-a-straight-face

On Thursday night I saw the real life Job from "Arrested Development". It was a grown man on a hoover board in a parking lot and there was another guy with him who was just walking behind.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/22/2016

The Daily Chatter*

04/22/2016

Mary needs to bring Riley into work soon. I need a Riley fix. I had a horrible dream the other night that Mary let Riley loose around some giant killer crab.

Roger says that Dot just stares at him now after reading "The Chatter". He hasn't seen anything yet, wait till next week after Roxanne's Baby Shower. I've been saving my Roger Diary for just the perfect occasion. I'm not sure if we'll be able to get through all eighty nine chapters but I'll sure try.

Roger actually gave Andrew great advice today. He told him not to park in the parking lots of strip clubs or go through naked chicks espresso with the company van. Then he proceeded with all of his stories of getting caught. He of course blames GB, his previous employer for not training him a little better.

Ryan wants to know why Roger likes the series "The Man in the High Castle" we haven't seen any sex scenes or naked women yet but of course we're not finished with the series either.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/21/2016

The Daily Chatter*

04/21/2016

Since it is Queen Elizabeth's 90th Birthday today I thought I would reminisce and share my Washington DC class trip picture of her from 1993. Four students (one of them was me) from my class were honored to lay a wreath at the tomb of the unknown soldier after Queen Elizabeth and George Bush Sr visited.

Roger accused me of not always telling the truth in the Daily Chatter....What the crap?

Prince died of the flu.  I'm sure Roger will think that's bogus too.

Bill somehow got Dot and Crystal mixed up today when I mentioned something. If I were Dot I would be offended.

Just a reminder tomorrow is Toni's Hawaiian shirt Friday.

"You admit that you're the problem." Bill to Steve

*not to be construed as Gossip