12/09/2016

The Daily Chatter*

12/09/2016

I think Roger was out past his bedtime last night because he was all uppity this morning.

Tim was sure entertaining all of the ladies in his office yesterday.

Kirk Douglas officially turns 100 today.

Steve seemed to be a little worried today when I mentioned I was going to call his wife about his choices. Apparently I need Toni's mother to come in here and give her "make good choices" speech to him.

Steve's at the water park until Wednesday of next week. What the heck? Doesn't he understand that Bill just went through something traumatizing and that Bill needs him to be a nap buddy.

 

*not to be construed as Gossip

12/08/2016

The Daily Chatter*

12/08/2016

Toni wants to know the second that it starts snowing.

I am going to have a very stern discussion with Dot about leaving Roger by himself. She went to Orlando this week and on top of it Roger was left alone over the weekend.....

Steve's cure all is take a tablespoon of bleach. 

Roger already told me that he's going to tear up the town with Matt tonight. 


Department 56 finally caught on to the true meaning of Christmas. They are finally selling Cousin Eddie and the RV.

 

*not to be construed as Gossip

12/07/2016

The Daily Chatter*

12/07/2016

Brrrrrrrr, don't try the triple dog dare today.

 
I finally got Bill to sign his resignation letter but of course he had to make several demands first.

Tim came back from lunch and immediately needed to shred his receipt from the strip club that all of the guys (except Toni) went to today.

Tim is now offering to pay me to take his parents to Reno for him.

Good news ladies, Matt claims that he's coming stag to the Christmas Party.

*not to be construed as Gossip

12/06/2016

The Daily Chatter*

12/06/2016

Now I absolutely know that Mary is Beverly Goldberg, she has a freaky pillow that looks like Michael (her son, not Tim's spa weekend lover). 

I understand that Google street view likes to protect some of our privacy by blurring faces and license plates but taking away peoples body parts, that's taking it a little far.

Toni may not be in tomorrow, somebody gave him 1.75 liters of Tequila for some early Christmas cheer.

Roger was depressed because he had to talk to me.

Apparently Toni's dad has grandchildren on his brain. Steve and Toni were at Toni's parents house and Steve took one of the car seats out to make room for something and Toni's dad asked if that was for the grand kids....Poor Steve first someone assumes that he's the dad of Ryan G. and now he has grandchildren.

Typhinee's Home Depot stalker came in today and recognized her from a zillion years ago. I have a feeling that he will be back.

*not to be construed as Gossip

12/05/2016

The Daily Chatter*

12/05/2016

"If they start hard balling, I'll claim mental health issues." Roger  Bill was pretty sure if they picked anyone out of Roger's second grade class they would be able to testify that Roger had issues back then.

Roger seems to very lost today. I'm pretty sure it's because his wife left him alone all weekend. She really should know better by now.

"In my defense I have a disease." Bill

Toni shared this food porn commercial with all of us today only because he was really into the pool boy and wanted to know where to get one.

I want to know why the word creamy is acceptable to Toni but not moist?

Ryan and I decided to see the snow early this week. We went to Mount Rainier yesterday and were going to snowshoe at Paradise but they never opened the gate at Longmire so we briefly got to snowshoe around Longmire and I was a stupid idiot and forgot my snow boots but I improvised with plastic bags and luckily those kept my feet dry.

*not to be construed on Gossip

12/02/2016

The Daily Chatter*

12/02/2016

Roger forgot that Bernie Mac died and his excuse was that it's been 8 or 9 years. Apparently he thinks Al Capone is still alive too. The odd thing is there were two honorings for Bernie Mac last month: one was Steve Harvey announcing a Bernie Mac Day in Chicago and the High School Bernie Mac went to renamed their auditorium in his honor.

"Every time I turn around it's a f*$%ing picture of Matt." Bill to Steve about our new brochure

Today we are 99% sure that Bill doesn't have lymphoma, Aids, Demon Pox, Hawaiian Cat Flu or Ebola.

"She is fired as my PR agent." Bill about Roxanne

*not to be construed as Gossip

12/01/2016

The Daily Chatter*

12/01/2016

It was sweet and touching, Roger was worried about Bill this morning.

Steve was pretty sure that there was something kinky going on with Typhinee and Sarah today until he realized that Typhinee had a baby on her lap.  

Steve made Katherine cry, she did not like him trying to playing peek-a-boo with her while she was watching Sesame Street.

Roger screwed up my day. I was watching Katherine and he texted Bill a picture of the two of them and all of a sudden Bill showed up and wanted his baby back.

I heard that Tim and Michael get to have a short fling tomorrow. Tim made it sound like they were going to some fancy resort and doing spa treatments all day. He was super stoked about the Four Hands Massage and the Ice Cream Pedicure. I hope he read the fine print because I'm sure it doesn't include real ice cream.

No matter what Katherine says don't put your finger in her mouth, those teeth are sharp. I think she uses her daddy's knife sharpener on them.

*not to be construed as Gossip