04/30/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/30/2020

Tim says there was a Gun Fight at the OK Corral on his street the other night. It sounded like the guy involved who lived on his street was awesome, I'm really not sure why he didn't introduce this guy to Ashley before he went to jail.

I now have a new title at work of Fire Marshall.

Tim objects to the front door being locked only because he's tired of running into it.

Bill gets his car back tomorrow so it's going to be a very emotional day for him.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/29/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/29/2020

I don't think it was a good idea for us to have told Sarah about these quarantine hotels. She was already at home packing in her mind when we were telling her about them yesterday.

Bill somehow turned hint of lime chips into hint of lamb chips....he might be onto something especially if we have a meat shortage.

Steve told Bill how much he cared for him today by telling him that he's not worthless like Roxanne always tells him he is.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/28/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/28/2020

Sarah made a rare appearance at the office today.

Bill seems to want to bring back rectal thermometers since the forehead ones aren't available. He also has some very kinky ideas for how to use them too.

Steve almost lost his title as safety supervisor today but luckily I saved his a$$.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/27/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/27/2020

Ashley came back today, it's finally starting to feel like the women are taking back the office. 

Matt wanted to know who put the pictures up of the kitties in the warehouse, I had to remind him that was Sarah's second office.

Toni had Federal agents at his house setting up a sting because he's had stolen mail and now identity theft.

I answered the door today and it was a lost young man asking for directions and Bill asked me why I didn't introduce him to Ashley. I was honestly saving her and I deserve praise for that, he looked like a young Justin Bieber and he was looking for a temp service so obviously he didn't have as great of a career as Bieber or any career for that matter. Besides she like her men (boys) younger than that.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/23/2020 & 04/24/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/23/2020

The first thing out of Toni's mouth yesterday when he found out about Bill's car was "Does Tim know about this?"

4/24/2020

I was told that Michael's wife was going to cut his hair the other day but there must have been an issue because he did it himself and one armed too.

Michael has a special box for hanging pictures. I told Bill that sounded awfully metro sexual (or another word) and yes he's very proud of that box. 

Bill told Josh that he was the talk of the office since he quit smoking. I'll leave Bill in charge of dealing with Josh's ego from now on.

Bill thinks that we should vape disinfectants instead of injecting them like Trump mentioned.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/22/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/22/2020

Gabe asked why I was in the warehouse today and I informed him that I was taking over his job then Bill told me that I needed to move faster so apparently I won't be helping out with any of my crazy ideas anymore because I'm too old and fat according to Bill.

Ryan received a care package from work today in the mail with food and snacks. Bill informed me that he's not that nice and won't be doing that for his employees because he doesn't want us to feel too appreciated.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/21/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/21/2020

"That's not the reason why I think that you're stupid." Bill to me

Bill was surprised that I noticed that it wasn't his car in the parking lot. I know I can be oblivious at times but his rental car was a black car in a different Tesla model so yes I might just notice that like everybody else did today.

Tim tried volunteering himself to get arrested yesterday for not wanting to leave a State Park. I didn't think that we've been that mean to him lately to want that sort of punishment but then again he was very disappointed that the hot cocoa with marshmallows was a scam because the marshmallows melted and I didn't take him seriously enough.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/20/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/20/2020

Ryan thought that Steve looked very pretty today, I think Ryan was jealous that Steve got his hair cut and I keep forgetting to cut his.

Tim was very upset that the entrance to Mt Rainier wasn't open for him this last weekend even though he went to the wrong entrance for starters and secondly the other entrance is closed for Corona Virus Days.

Steve wants all us to be crazy like him and thinks we should watch "Tiger King". I think I'm perfectly happy being my own sort of crazy without watching that show. Besides if I watch the show I'm pretty sure I'll want to own a big cat just so that I could dress it up and let it go on walks with me. 

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/17/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/17/2020

Steve and I were fighting over who got to kill Josh today if he really lost his regular tires for his van like he thought he did.

Bill thought it was odd that Roxanne told him to wait at the store until they restocked her favorite wine, I told him that sounded pretty normal to me.

Josh claims he stopped smoking when he started sitting at home so hopefully seeing Steve again on Monday won't make him need a cigarette.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/16/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/16/2020

Marty told my husband that I was going to tie him up later...I think Ryan wanted to know why I was telling Marty about my sexual fantasies.

Michael needs to hang some more names of employees on his computer monitor because he didn't know another name today.

I read a headline that Elon Musk says that Teslas will park themselves later this year. Well I sure the heck don't believe it after seeing what Bill's car drove into.

I think most of you will agree with me that this person parked worse than Mary in our parking lot and they sat there for hours, they should really feel stupid since Bill and I were bored and judging them.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/15/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/15/2020

"I don't think they'll give us adjoining cells." Bill to Mary about a great idea

I got an email from Michael (that was supposed to go to Typh) about an ad for an air boat. Now I'm very confused, does Typh like air boats and I just didn't' know about it or does she only like air boat rides with Michael and I didn't know about it?

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/14/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/14/2020

Bill mentioned that he might bring Jason back for something yesterday. I told him to be careful or I may inflict bodily harm on him.

Bill and Steve were arguing this morning over whose way was the laziest way to accomplish a task out in the warehouse.

It was a heck of a good day, I found foaming hand soap refills online. They're almost as hard to find as toilet paper if you haven't noticed.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/13/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/13/2020

Mary claims that she saw an albino whale over the weekend out at her beach house and with that being said we all now know how she's been passing her time.

The Jimmy John's guy started walking back to the wrong car today until he saw the missing hole on Bill's front bumper and realized it wasn't his car.

Steve had to tell Ashley to put down her cocktail this morning because according to him she wasn't making any sense to him on the phone.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/10/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/10/2020

It sounds like Tim scared the crap out of Faith yesterday by telling her that he called one of her daughters and told them that she was working (when he actually hadn't). I told her that she could feel free to beat him with his six foot long corona stick that he has in his office.

I accused Steve of only making a mess out of the warehouse today but he claims he has a plan (so we'll see).

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/09/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/09/2020

Matt was so bored that he actually came to the shop to get his tools today and to see other people.

Bill apparently threatened Tim that if he wasn't here selling crap that he would have to go back to doing all of his own invoicing again.

Tim's still working his magic and selling.

Corona virus days have caused Mary to reconsider ever retiring so at least one good thing has come of this disaster.

"I'm struggling with my greediness." Tim

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/08/2020

The Daily Chatter*

 04/08/2020

Oops my mistake yesterday, Bill's car didn't back into the truck it drove into the truck head on. Bill said that was one very confused truck driver when he realized nobody was driving the car.

Bill's very upset that Steve said anything about his car debacle and he reminded me of the revenge that he got when Matt S. showed up to his wedding drunk and he had to spend the next few weeks installing at a gay bath house.

Ashley told Bill that she went for a run the other day. He replied to the comment and she had to admit that she only went for a beer run.

Tim wishes that things would get back to normal so that he could take a break.

The iphone changed the word Disney to Diane today in Bill's text and now Bill thinks he's getting a divorce.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/07/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/07/2020

It definitely pays to be nice to Faith, I scored an 8 oz bottle of sanitizer today. Once Tim finds out he'll probably try to steal it from me or play his age card that he needs it more than I do.

"I'm going to go take photos of fun things in my office." Toni

Faith heard Bill tell me that my desk should be moved under the sagging ceiling and she figured that Bill was already tired of me during our Corona Virus Days but what she didn't realize was that my desk sat under a sagging beam for years at a previous company.

Bill might become a little more hesitant with the app for his car after today, the dang thing had a mind of its own and backed into a truck.

Who the heck would have ever thought that it could come down to this during these times?

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/06/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/06/2020

Nikki thinks Toni is an a$$hole now she's spent several days in a row with him at home.

"Is the surgeon general gay because that's the biggest conversation at our house." Toni

Sorry Toni Jerome Adams (the surgeon general) is not one of the village people even though he wears a uniform and he seems to be married to a woman but we all know how deceiving that can be.

"I'm the owner so bite me." Mary's new slogan for her business card

Mary thinks that we should hang this sign up on the back door. I might change a few of the names though.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/02/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/02/2020

It was a big day for me around here, I saw another woman at the office today, Sarah came in.

Randy saw a lady in her car smoking but she was wearing a mask and would take off the mask every time she puffed her cigarette.

The guys were trying to figure out one of the mysteries of life today and why and who is leaving a metal mark on the toilet seat everyday. My bet is somebody's belt is hitting or rubbing on the seat. I've installed a camera so that we'll know for sure.

*not to be construed as Gossip

04/01/2020

The Daily Chatter*

04/01/2020

Obviously Mary found any excuse to get Randy out of the house today, she had him at the shop detailing one of the vans.

I saw Bill out on the forklift today and that's not an April Fool's joke. He was obviously tired of competing with Tim for sales for the week or he was trying to find an easy out for not winning this week.

Tim finally realized what I scored at Costco the other day.

I'm starting to think that Bill has told too many people about my special tea because now it's on back order for three weeks.

*not to be construed as Gossip